Our sovereign ruler, Mistress Marlene Krauss, was born on January 17, 1941, in New York City. Consulting an old Farmer’s almanac, Legends has learned that, on that exact date, the Earth underwent a complete solar eclipse, the moon passing in front of the sun, blotting out its life-giving rays and enveloping our fair planet in a stygian darkness. But of course that’s just a coincidence.
Marlene’s father, Julius Krauss, was born on March 16, 1898, in Hungary. A plumber by trade, Julius presided over the destruction of the Chelsea Hotel ’s famous stained glass windows and plate glass mirrors, among other irreplaceable treasures. He died in sunny Florida on September 18, 1978, his dream of completely demolishing the Chelsea left to his daughter to fulfill.
Marlene’s mother, Pearl Moldovan, was born on December 18, 1908 in Hungary. Feeling that Stanley Bard was getting a lot of undeserved attention, she urged her husband to take a greater role in the management of the Chelsea. She died on May 5, 1983, also in Florida, her dream bequeathed to Marlene as well.
After Marlene’s birth, Julius and Pearl decided not to have any more children.
Pausing briefly from her busy schedule, Marlene married Zachary Berk on September 16, 1984. Consulting our Farmer’s Almanac we discovered that there was a rain of frogs that day, always propitious.)
Marlene is Zachary’s second wife, good ol’ Zack having divorced his first wife, Suzanna Thomas (talk about having the last laugh!), in 1979. Zachary was born on November 27, 1947, and—though Legends reported in error that the lovebirds met at his funeral -- Marlene hasn’t killed him yet. Marlene and Zachary have three children, and Zachary brought three of his own to the union. So it must be kind of like the Brady Bunch around their house—only without the laughs. (Photo: Zachary Berk via Google)
Dark Mistress Marlene also has a child from an extramarital affair with Cthulhu. As the spawn of this unholy union increases in power daily, Marlene’s control over him wanes, and he now threatens to devour her. -- Ed Hamilton
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