Will Marlene Change Her Evil Ways?

     Because of the downturn in the economy caused by greedy developers and stockbrokers, travelers have been canceling reservations in droves, and hotel occupancy rates this month declined 11% over last year (see Crain’s). As Stanley predicted (I have him on video!), the real estate bubble has burst, and now his “eccentric” business practices are starting to look more and more like the wise strategy they always were. Renting out the rooms to permanent residents insures a steady stream of income in tough economic times. Hotels are already starting to discount rooms and offer more package tours in order to attract guests—but what the hell are we going to do here, where room rates were long ago slashed to the bone!? Marlene may be praying for those 17 tenants she forced out to come back yet! 
 The good news here is that management probably won’t be so dead set on getting rid of the retail tenants (such as suite 303 and the dentist’s office) anytime soon. (Though these tenants were told that their leases wouldn’t be renewed, they are obviously in a much better bargaining position now.) Our suggestion is that the doors of the hotel be opened to a few more permanent residents at market rates. Though I guess it’s a bit much to ask at this point that struggling artists be admitted, there are many high-profile creative types who would pay top dollar to live here. There has always been a high turnover of permanent rooms here, and so more rooms will come open in the future for transient use. It’s foolish to be dead-set against the possibility of ever renting to another permanent resident.
 So will Marlene change her ways, and start showing good business sense, rather than allowing the Chelsea to continue to bleed money? Nah, she’s too stubborn. And anyway, this is not really about money. It’s about punishing Stanley Bard. -- Ed Hamilton