Living with Legends: Hotel Chelsea Blog

Storme DeLarverie Live From the Chelsea Hotel

After Jaz Jericho lost his battle to stay at the Chelsea Hotel he held a secret midnight going away party.
Storme DeLarverie stopped by and serenaded the crowd with her version of "I Fell For You."  Turn up the volume. It's awesome! Unfortunately, Storme is out of the frame on the far right of the screen.

Return of the Slumlord

After the recent, highly disturbing commotion at the Chelsea Hotel, minority shareholder David Elder had retreated to his bungalow in L.A., 3,000 miles being what he figured was a safe distance from the scene of his hilarious public humiliation.  Having disconnected his phone and discontinued his mail service, he figured there was no way any of those pesky Bohemians could possibly contact him.  Finally beginning to relax after a week of looking over his shoulder and jumping out of his boots at the slightest sound, Elder was just sitting down to a steaming plate of Chef-Boy-Ardee spaghetti-and-meatballs when he heard a rather insistent rapping at his door.

            Peeking out from a crack in his curtains, Elder’s body convulsed in a spasm of terror when he spied the tiny, scowling woman, and he immediately lost control of his bowels.  It was Marlene Krauss, Harvard MBA, Mistress of the Damned.

“I see you in there, Elder!  You ratfink!  Let me in this minute!” Marlene screamed, hammering on the door with her fist.

            Elder dropped to the floor, crawled quickly across the room, and hid, shivering in fright, underneath his bed.  Cursing under her breath, Marlene found a shovel that the gardener had left in his wheelbarrow and used that to pry open the door.  Striding across the room, she reached  under the bed, got a hold of Elder’s ear, and, twisting it painfully, pulled him out from under the bed and up to his feet.  “Get your things together right now,” she commanded.   “You’re going back to be slumlord of the Chelsea!”  And then, wrinkling her nose in disgust, she exclaimed, “My God, you stink!  You’re riding coach!”

“Please, Marlene, don’t make me go back there,” Elder begged, trembling uncontrollably.  “You promised me I was going to be a high powered real estate mogul, but instead the Bohemians threw stink bombs in my face and poured water on my head!”

Glancing around, Marlene seized the plate of spaghetti from the table and slopped it upside Elder’s head.  “Get a hold of yourself!” she said.  “Be a man!”

“Artists, my ass.  Treat ‘em like the deadbeat scum they are.  Put the fear of God in them, and they’ll fall to their knees and grovel.  That’s the best policy,” Marlene declared .  “The only policy.  And while you’re at it, get rid of that tailor too.  I’ve got a plan to put a pay toilet in that space and make a real killing!”

Elder tried to slink back under his bed, but Marlene grabbed him by the ear again and stood over him while he packed his suitcase.  For his punishment, Marlene denied Elder the box lunch on the plane back, which was a big disappointment for him, since it contained a reconstituted turkey sandwich, carrot sticks, and a fudge cookie.  He would have surely starved, he reflected with pride, had he not had the presence of mind to suck the spaghetti sauce from his shirt.

Back in New York, Elder hesitated once more as he was getting out of the cab, and so Marlene, with the help of the bouncers from Star Lounge—who thought their tip quite inadequate--had to drag him bodily into the Chelsea.  “Don’t you make me have to come back here again,” Marlene warned Elder as she deposited him in the lobby.  “I can’t stand this godforsaken dump.” -- Ed Hamilton  (Many thanks to a tipster for the photo.)

Featured Events

Wednesday, May 28, 7:00 p.m.
Ethan Hawke, Clement Joseph & Val Vinokur read from "Night Wraps the Sky: Writings by and About Mayakovsky." A most unusual and exceptional event.
192 Books, 10^th Avenue@ 22^nd Street

Monday, June 2, 7:00 p.m.
Photographer Julia Calfee (INSIDE The Chelsea Hotel)and writer Ed Hamilton (Legends of the Chelsea Hotel) team up for “The Chelsea Hotel in Words and Pictures.” Who knows what excitement will transpire but you can count on a slideshow, discussion, and reading.
McNally Robinson Bookstore, 52 Prince St.NY NY

Thursday, June 5, 7:00 p.m.
Joe O’Neill will be reading and signing from his new novel Netherland. A fascinating post-9/11 story that takes place in London, in the Chelsea Hotel in New York, and in the outer reaches of the city’s boroughs. A remarkable study of a marriage—and a world—on the brink of chaos, what it means to be an outsider and a stranger in a strange land-, the hidden underworld of New York and the inevitable solace of the game of cricket. 
192 Books, 10^th Avenue@ 22^nd Street

After 21 Years at the Chelsea Hotel, Say Good-bye to the Balabanis

This is the last week that Mr. And Mrs. Balabanis will be operating the Tailor shop at the Chelsea Hotel.  They’ve been in the Chelsea neighborhood for 31 years – 21 of those years were spent at a tiny store front  in the Hotel.  At first, he was over on 25^th Street and he was Stanley Bard’s tailor.  Stanley invited him to move his business to the Hotel.  Stanley, whom was always the dapper dresser, obviously would want his tailor near by.

Here is how the ouster of the Bard family has played out for the Balabanis.  The first group of managers (Richard Born & Ira Drukier) wouldn’t even come in and talk to him.  When they finally did get around to stopping by, all they did was start taking measurements and tell him they were going to break down the wall between his shop and Stanley’s office and open a bar in that space.

Now, he said, there are other people (not the Bards) who want to talk to him and they want him to pay more rent and take a short lease.  He said “It’s too late to talk.”  He doesn’t want a short lease and his business doesn’t make a lot of money.  He’s retiring and going to Greece.  Now there will be another empty retail space at the Chelsea.  So much for making all of that money by optimizing the retail spaces.

Renowned Blues man Vlad, who plays the guitar on 23^rd & 7^th, has a suggestion for the tiny space.  He’d like to see a pay toilet installed.  That’s something that would be useful for him since he’s a street musician.  We second Vlad! We think a pay toilet is the ticket to helping Marlene Krauss and David Elder get rich off of the Chelsea. They can’t have a bar anyway because of El Quixote’s non-compete clause, what else are they gonna put in there!

Our friend and fellow blogger across the street, James Wagner, really needs to update his history of the retail establishments on this block of 23rd Street.

Cannes "Chelsea on the Rocks" Press Conference

Now online!  Check out Jen, Willem, (We wonder if Willem crossed the pond on the Sea Banana?) & Nile and other celebrities such as Dennis Hopper.

David Bard Appears Ready To Return to the Chelsea

Julia Calfee greets David Bard at her book signing at Rizzoli's Bookstore earlier this week.  In our opinion, David looks relaxed and ready to return to the Chelsea Hotel.  Now that the corporate suits have been removed somebody needs to manage the Hotel!

 

In “Bettina” Filmmaker Sam Bassett and Artist Bettina Restore Order to the Chelsea: (And Not a Moment Too Soon)

The film opens with the a shot of the roof of the Chelsea, tracking into Sam’s studio—for better or worse he has stripped all traces of Norman Gosney’s decadent boudoir décor from the space--juxtaposed with a shot of Bettina sitting in her familiar place outside her room.  To the accompaniment of eerily mystical drumming, we see various haunting shots of Bettina: picking up leaves by the railroad trestle, riding the ferry past the Statue of Liberty, and reading her poetry on a moving walkway.  What’s the story behind this tiny, unobtrusive elderly lady, slowly pushing her cart down the chaotic streets as the unseeing juggernaut of New York rushes madly by her?  Does she even have one?

Indeed she does.  The film, titled simply “Bettina” is a story mostly about the enigmatic Bettina, but about the tall, bearded filmmaker Sam Bassett as well: it chronicles several months in their lives as each seeks the aid of the other in restoring a sort of rhyme and reason to a life and a corner of the city that has fallen seriously out of kilter.  Sam sets out to restore Bettina to her proper place in the world—the art world that has neglected her genius, and the world of the present day that seems to have moved on and left her behind.  Bettina’s struggle is spiritual and almost cosmological in scope: through her art she seeks to reveal the Noumenon, or the invisible secret essence of things, and thus to lead the people of this world out of confusion into order.  (Bettina would no doubt like me to mention, for the record, that poet Ira Cohen knows nothing of this.)  For both individuals, who bond in the intuitive understanding of this arcane ideal, the quest resolves itself into the more mundane physical goal of cleaning-up and setting Bettina’s cluttered apartment/studio aright so she can display her art and re-establish her Noumenonological Institute.

            It’s not easy.  It takes Sam awhile to earn Bettina’s trust and to gain admission into the inner sanctum of her studio; and Bettina, for her part, can’t quite see how rearranging all her boxes and putting her papers into storage is actually going to help achieve order.  It seems to her that her the boxes and stacks of papers piled to the ceiling are already where they should be and now Sam is simply messing them up.  “I may never be able to have the same order again,” she says.  But Bettina is convinced by the end result: Sam builds shelves and hangs her paintings, and together they transform the large space into a museum showcasing Bettina’s huge and varied body of sculpture, drawings, and photography.

            Highlights of the film include: the death-defying Sam riding his skateboard down the middle of 23^rd street pushing a shopping cart loaded with supplies, Sam and Bettina filming each other across 6^th Avenue as a Marathon race takes place on the street between them, and the highly comical footage of Sam lifting Bettina in his arms and running her up a hill at Storm King Japanese Sculpture Garden.

            As we battle the money-grubbing minority shareholders who ousted Stanley and seized control of our beloved Chelsea, it’s rewarding to step back for a moment and consider exactly what it is we’re fighting for—the hidden essence or Noumenon at the core of the Chelsea Hotel.  And if that essence doesn’t involve Bettina and the dozens of others misunderstood artists like her hiding away here at the hotel, then I don’t know what else it could involve.  At the time of the film’s events Bettina was being subjected to court hearings in which the minority shareholders and their hired guns at BD were seeking to evict her for clutter.  Well, thanks to Sam—who through his work has revealed a small part of the order underlying what some may dismiss as anarchy—these sociopathic pirates now have absolutely no hope of implementing their unconscionable plan.-- Ed Hamilton

Angelina Jolie Caught on Stanley Bard's Hidden Camera?

Seems like the entire world is talking about this video which was allegedly filmed here at the Chelsea Hotel in 1999. The room is so dark that it's hard to say for sure whether or not it's really the Chelsea. But hey, if the rest of the world says it's the Chelsea Hotel we're willing to play along.  At least it's a temporary diversion from writing about stink bombs and evil Hotel heirs.

Weight Problem?

Artie says this gentleman tips the scales at over 300 lbs. rather than the 275 that Legends estimated. He also says, Men's Warehouse.  Anyone else?

Featured Events & Chelsea Hotel News

Just in case you haven't picked up a newspaper or read a blog lately, here's a round-up of links to coverage of the recent events at the Chelsea Hotel.
"Boss INN & Out" -- New York Post
"Stinkbombs, Schuffles & Anarchy" -- Chelsea Now
"A Crucial Chapter for a Storied Hotel" -- LA Times, Chicago Tribune
"Legendarisch Chelsea vecht voor zijn ziel" --  De Pers
"Manner Nachte: Wo Legenden Leb(T)EN" -- Focus Magazine
"At a Haven for Creative Souls, a Prolific Talent is Affirmed" -- New York Times
"More Shakeups at the Chelsea Hotel" - Observer Real Estate Blog
"Ousted Chelsea Hotel Managers File for Arbitration" -- Observer Real Estate Blog
"Chaos at the Chelsea!"  -- Observer Real Estate Blog
"Elder Strikes Back" -- Observer Real Estate Blog
"Meanwhile at the Hotel Chelsea" -- curbed.com
"Big Bruise & Tribute Tattoos" -- curbed.com
"Meanwhile at the Hotel Chelsea" -- curbed.com
"Has The Chelsea Kicked Out Their Douchy New Management" -- gawker.com
"Hotel Chelsea Ousts Glennon Travis" -- gothamist.com
"BD Hotels No Longer Managing Hotel Chelsea" -- hotelchatter.com
"Chelsea Hotel management on the way out" -- City Room

Tuesday, May 20, 5:30 - 7:00 p.m.
Rizzolli Bookstore will host a book signing with photographer Julia Calfee.  So head uptown, wine and bubbly will be served.
Rizzolli Bookstore, 31 West 57th Str., between 5th & 6th Avenue

Friday, May 23,
Curator Arthur Nash's scaled down version of his much larger traveling show “Infernal Machines, The Evolution of US Capital Punishment,” has its grand opening at the National Museum of Crime and Punishment in Washington D.C.

Friday, May 23,
Filmmaker Abel Ferrara's new documentary "Chelsea on the Rocks," will premiere at the Cannes film festival. According to the press release, "Chelsea on the Rocks’ celebrates the personalities and artistic voices that have emerged from New York's legendary Chelsea Hotel. Once considered an untouchable, impenetrable tower for writers, artists, musicians and mavericks, it has been recently claimed as a boutique hotel venture for a management company that shows disregard for its formidable history."  Guess there's time to rewrite the copy before the U.S. premiere, which will be at CineVegas. 

Reclaim the Chelsea Hotel!

Now that we’ve swept BD Hotels into the dustbin of Chelsea history, let their onerous regulations also be exorcised once and for all from our fair building!  Remember when they first arrived, and, scowling, stood in our way and physically barred us from retrieving our mail from behind the front desk?  That area behind the desk is a common area that was stolen from us by BD.  And now that they are no more, there’s no reason why we shouldn’t reclaim it.  If you have mail in your box, go back there and get it yourself.  And strike a blow for freedom!
           Also, the desk staff should bring back their TV and their radio: what’s the harm in them listening to a little bit of music or catching the action on the Yankees game?  Especially if it’s quiet in the hotel and there’s nothing going on?

Fellow residents: cast off your shackles!  Move your furniture back into the hallways, and let your pets and your children once again run free in the halls!  (I myself will be rooting through the rubbish to find interesting items to replace my Garbage Art installations confiscated by the evil philistine Glennon Travis.)  Let us celebrate anew the spirit of freedom and non-conformity that has reigned for 125 years at the Chelsea Hotel. -- Ed Hamilton  (UPDATE: Thanks to Artie Nash for sending over the photo of the rules.)

Goons Body Slam Resident, Prowl Chelsea Halls

        Check out Chris Shott’s Observer article on last weekend’s confrontation between hotel layabout David Elder, recently promoted (or was he?) to a position of somewhat greater power, and hotel resident and pro-Stanley Bard activist Arthur Nash.  Amid the hilarious recounting of Elder being chased by his doppelganger, having an unspecified (hopefully noxious) liquid dumped on his head, and drinking a Shirley Temple, Shott correctly points out that Nash never physically accosted or threatened the novice hotelier.  He just gave him a piece of his mind.
            But Shott doesn’t detail the later confrontation that erupted between Nash and one of the gigantic goons Elder hired in response to Nash’s criticism.  According to Nash, what happened on Monday night was that after he retrieved his mail from behind the front desk, he was barred from entering the elevator and menaced by the approximately 6’5”,  275 lb. security guard (who had apparently been instructed to deal harshly with Nash).  After returning to his room to get his camera—he had been instructed by his lawyer to document all confrontations—Nash attempted to take the guard’s picture.  In response, the guard tried to wrench the camera away from Nash and then grabbed him in a bear hug and body slammed him against the front desk, smashing the camera (and Nash’s hand) against the counter repeatedly until the batteries flew out.  The guard continued to wrestle with Nash as Nash tried to use the house phone to call the police.  A resident who had witnessed the altercation, and who corroborated Nash’s story, said that in all his or her time at the Chelsea, he or she had never seen anything so frightening.   Nash eventually did manage to call the police, but they decided they didn’t have sufficient cause to arrest the guard.  (The photo of one of Nash’s injuries speaks volumes.)            
        The day before, Sunday, two other goons—with Elder standing behind them--had hassled Nash as well, chest butting him and trying to force him into the back stairwell off the lobby where there are no security cameras, and of course, no witnesses.  And then, on Tuesday afternoon, two goons were caught milling around outside Nash’s apartment, in an apparent attempt to intimidate Nash and his girlfriend.  (I don’t even know where the hell we’re living anymore—some kind of alternate, Bizarro Chelsea.)
           One mistake in the article: Piri Thomas is not Elder’s father-in-law.  This would imply that someone, presumably a woman, had actually consented to marry Elder at some point in time, a patent absurdity.  Piri married Elder’s mother, making him Elder’s step-father (and I’ll bet he wishes he would have paddled young Elder’s butt a bit more severely while he had the chance!)
  [By the way, Arthur’s show in DC is a scaled down version of his much larger traveling show “Infernal Machines, The Evolution of US Capitol Punishment,” and it opens on May 16^th, with the grand opening scheduled for May 23^rd, at the National Museum of Crime and Punishment in Washington D.C.] -- Ed Hamilton

Chelsea Hotel On Lockdown

Now that hotel layabout David Elder has finally gotten a taste of power, it seems to have gone to his head completely.  He has taken to wearing bad suits, apparently cast-offs from the cut-rate funeral parlor, and worse, he has hired his own goon squad to stand in the lobby, to stalk the halls on un-specified errands of intimidation, and to walk down the street to the deli with him when he goes out to get a pack of Twinkies.  One of the goons has already assaulted a resident.  Any one of us could be next.

Do I really need to mention that this flies in the face of the beautiful tradition of freedom and tolerance that has prevailed at the Chelsea for 125 years?  It didn’t take this creep long to show his true colors, and I, for one, would rather see the building torn to the ground, brick by brick, than to see the home and the ideal that I have grown to know and love reduced to such indignity. -- Ed Hamilton

Chelsea Hotel Finances: Elder, Thugs, and Rubenstein Overpaid

As we’ve indicated earlier, Legends was able to obtain the court papers relating to BD NY Hotels vs. Chelsea 23^rd Street Corp.  Interestingly enough, these papers include an itemized list of the hotel’s expenditures over the last few months of 2007.  Rest assured, we are studying these closely to see where our rent money is going.
          Anyway, one of the highlights of the list are the payments to hotel layabout David Elder: $365.25 in July, $131.37 in August, $706.65 in November, and three payments of $706.65, $478.90, and 455.06 for a whopping $1640.41 in December.  (Unlike all the other expenses listed—including items such as carpet, carpentry supplies, furniture ordered by Stanley, accounting, legal—these payments to Elder are unexplained, though one time it does say, simply, “expenses”.)  Scarcely what we would call a valued employee—though he did get quite a raise in December.  And let’s not forget about the spacious apartment he has been allowed to use for 9 months free of charge!

            Also, between July and December, Marlene and BD spent $146,143.59 of the hotel’s money in legal fees, presumably at least in part to battle Stanley Bard, and another $26,285 on payments to accounting firms, presumably to dig up dirt on the old man (those accountants could learn a thing or two from the lawyers).  In addition “security requested by Marlene Krauss” runs the hotel $13,655.25. What the hell?! you ask.  Well, remember the goons that looked like rejects from the Sopranos that sat in the lobby for awhile?  These fine fellows were no doubt necessary  to prevent Stanley from overpowering David Elder and stealing the Larry Rivers painting from the wall.
            Perhaps most interesting, at least from our point of view, is the money paid to Rubenstein for “public relations/crisis management”: two payments of $45,000 each!  (Well, one for $45, 212.58—probably charged Marlene for copies or something.  Lawyers ain’t got nothin’ on them.)  And what did Rubenstein do, exactly?  Issue a couple of half-assed press releases and refuse to take calls from the media?  The whole Stanley Bard ouster turned into one hell of a big, fat, hairy public relations disaster for both BD and the minority shareholders.  Marlene, why didn’t you just offer us $90,000 not to write about you?  We wouldn’t have taken it, but we certainly would have appreciated the gesture. -- Ed Hamilton  (Photo: David Elder proudly displaying his sign making skills.  Maybe that's why he gets the big bucks.  By the way, that sign recently returned to bite him in the butt.)

BD’s Ouster Represents a Great Victory for Anti-Gentrification Forces

Well, BD hasn’t come back, and as such, I just want to step back and point out—before we lose sight of this in our ongoing struggle--that their ouster represents a great victory for the residents of the Chelsea Hotel.  And it’s a victory not only for us, but for tenants of New York as a whole, and for all those allied in the fight against gentrification.  For here’s this huge real-estate firm,  whose owners came out and stated at the outset that they intended to evict the permanent tenants, gut renovate the Chelsea, and turn it into a fancy boutique hotel.  And where are Born and Drukier and their underlings now?  It seems we’ve evicted them!
        Sure, we had help from the downturn in the economy, and from the division between BD and the shareholders, and certainly from the press and the outraged public, but basically we got rid of them by organizing and staying together.  We lost 15 of our fellow residents, and we haven’t yet won the war, but we’ve won a huge battle.  And if a bunch of self-centered artists such as ourselves can do it, surely others can do it as well.  Let’s throw the greedy profiteers out of our city and return it to the real New Yorkers. -- Ed Hamilton (Photo: Robert Lambert's most recent painting.)
 

David Elder's Twin Stops by The Chelsea

A tipster writes in to report that David Elder's twin made an appearance at the Chelsea last evening and Elder himself was none too pleased. He tried to bar his long lost relation from entering the ballroom.  When he came face-to-face with his doppleganger -- a reflection of his guilty conscience --he fled in terror to cower in the inner sanctum of his office. You can run Elder, but you can't hide. The truth will follow you to your grave.  The tipster even sent along some photos for our enjoyment.

Marlene Krauss Launches Desperate Hotel Chelsea Ad Campaign

Now that she has fired the elite BD Hotels from their job of managing the Chelsea Hotel, Marlene Krauss has launched an aggressive outdoor ad campaign to attract a new manager.  Obviously, she has quickly come to the realization that anybody who walks in off of the street could do a better job than Chelsea Hotel Board Member David Elder. If you're walking by on the street and got a spare moment come in and apply. Our standards are not real high at this time.  NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY -- OBVIOUSLY.
 

Chelsea Hotel Historian Weighs In On The 125th Anniversary

Chelsea Hotel historian Sherill Tippins has written in to provide us with this fascinating tidbit that we hadn’t known before:

      "I just rediscovered this little factoid while editing Part I of my book:
       The Chelsea Hotel's birthdate (the day it opened and residents began moving in) is Oct. 1, 1884."

So, the 125^th anniversary of the opening of the Hotel will be on Oct 1, 2009. 

Update: Piri Thomas Thwarts David Elder’s latest Rip-Off Attempt

David Elder’s various plots to fleece the elderly are not bearing much fruit lately.  His attempt to take Stanley Bard to the cleaners has now cost him and Marlene (and of course the other shareholders) a ton of money, as well as the last shred of their already tattered credibility.  And now a California judge has thrown out Elder’s appeal of an earlier decision that granted his stepfather, renowned author Piri Thomas (Mean Streets), the right to collect the $1.2 million in dividends of which Elder sought to deprive him.

To recap: Elder administers a trust, set up by his deceased mother, Betty Gross Thomas, consisting of shares representing 16% of the Chelsea ’s ownership.  The 81-year-old Thomas, a former Chelsea Hotel resident, is supposed to receive the dividends from this trust.  In 2001 Elder decided he wasn’t going to pay the dividends to Piri anymore.  So Piri sued Elder for the $1.2 million which Elder had failed to pay him. (Piri still had to pay taxes of $494,000 on the money!) 

This dispute has been going on since 2001, with Piri winning every round.  Even after they reached a settlement in March 2005—with Piri generously agreeing to pay Elder $177,500, presumably for his legal bills--Elder sued again, based on a bogus interpretation of a new law that had been passed by the California State Senate.  The trial judge tossed the case out, saying, basically, that it had already been decided.  Elder appealed again, which brings us to the present case, where the appeals court just ruled on April 10^th that there was no merit to Elder’s case, saying it was “. . .nothing more than an attempt to resurrect their prior claim under the guise of a new claim. . .”

At one point in their long battle in the courts, Piri sued to remove Elder as a Trustee for breach of trust.  For you see, Elder has a vested interest in depriving Piri of his money (as well as in prolonging the case), as, once Piri dies, Elder becomes the beneficiary of the trust.  As part of the earlier mentioned settlement, Piri dropped these charges—only to be sued by Elder in return.

            Although it appears that Elder is being manipulated by lawyers who are filling his head with dreams of becoming some sort of millionaire real-estate mogul, it doesn’t change the fact that he has proven himself both morally and fiduciarily unfit to administer the trust in question.  For this same reason, he should be removed from the Board of Directors of the Chelsea Hotel.
        Anyway, congratulations to Piri for his victory in a fight he did not seek.  Justice has been done, and let’s hope that this is finally the end to a truly shameful saga of greed and moral depravity. – Ed Hamilton

Asbestos Threat at Chelsea Hotel Revealed

     Legends has recently been able to obtain the court documents filed in BD’s suit contesting their termination by Marlene Krauss.  Among the more disturbing revelations is BD’s claim that there is still asbestos in the building.
     This is a ticking time bomb, and it is outrageous that the residents of this building have not been informed.  This could affect the health of each and every resident in the Chelsea Hotel.  (I guess now we know why you’re seldom around.  For God’s sake, there are children and ill people living here, Marlene.) When were you planning on telling us this?  We demand to be informed of the full extent of the asbestos threat.

Here is the relevant passage from the letter.

Marlene's Shame

Be sure to check out Chris Shott’s piece in The New York Observer about BD’s shameful attempt to evict a dying man, Jann Paxton.  So what about it Marlene?  Is it so important to win your war against Stanley Bard that you’re willing to abandon ever last shred of common decency?  We think that, as a show of good will, you should at least pledge not to evict Jann Paxton. -- Ed Hamilton

Marlene's War

Things are getting a little bit ridiculous here at the Chelsea.  This powerful, egomaniacal businesswoman, Marlene Krauss, who should have better things to do with her time, has, for the past 20 years, been engaged in a mindless and destructive Vendetta against the majority shareholder and former manager of the Chelsea Hotel, Stanley Bard.  Recently, with the aid of BD Hotels, Marlene was able to oust Stanley from the position he had held for almost 50 years.  Time to uncork the Champagne, right, Marlene?
         Surely you jest.  For we have reason to believe that Marlene is still going after Stanley, apparently determined to dig up the dirt on him—whatever that might turn out to be—in order to force him to sell his beloved Chelsea.  Marlene apparently so hates this small, elderly man--with an unreasoning ferocity bordering on psychosis--that even the wholesale demolition of the Chelsea is unlikely to sate her unholy bloodlust.  Will she rest when Stanley is thrown into prison to spend his last few years scrapping with young toughs and busting up rocks in a quarry?  We doubt it.  Even when Stanley is dead and buried, we expect Marlene to dig up his bones and grind them to dust with a mortar and pestle—to season her foul witch’s brew.

We have come to believe that the feud with Stanley is the root of Marlene’s disagreement with BD.  She wouldn’t let them do their job because she was more concerned with using this place to get back at Stanley.  Since BD—though hardly known for their good works--wouldn’t cooperate to this end, they’re out of here.  (We’ll have more on this in a later post.)

So where does that leave the tenants of the Chelsea?  Well, obviously, right smack dab in the middle of the battlefield.  Now we have no manager!  Can you believe that?!  Nobody’s running the place at all.  Nobody is making up the schedule for the workers, and nobody is here to pay them.  And what if there’s a fire, or some other kind of emergency?  Who’s going to make sure that the residents get out safely?  All kinds of transients and other strangers are in and out of this building every day.  Some of them may be crazy, or on drugs.  Who’s going to deal with such potentially explosive situations?

Anyway, regardless of Stanley’s supposed sins, why should we residents have to pay for them?  Is it just because we respect him and want him back?  Or is it that Stanley was the one who brought us into the Chelsea, and Marlene won’t rest until she wipes every last vestige of his influence from the building?

Stop it, Marlene!  Back off.  Enough’s enough.  If you can’t bring yourself to return the Chelsea to the Bards, then at least hire a manager who will run the place the way it should be run: as the haven for the arts it has been for 125 years. -- Ed Hamilton

Artie Nash Gets on the Books and You Can Too!

BD Hotels sued Arthur Nash in housing court, alleging that his apartment was not rent stabilized.  But last week, when the judge asked BD to provide evidence to that effect, they couldn’t do it, and didn’t even try.  Arthur, on the other hand, had a letter wherein BD admitted that another Chelsea Hotel resident was rent stabilized.  The judge took one look at this letter and threw the case out.  (He dismissed the case with prejudice, which means that BD can refile if they come up with new evidence, but chances are they won’t be able to.)
        Arthur’s case is important for another reason as well, because he represented himself, and it shows that tenants don’t need to back down from BD and their high priced lawyers.  Judges in housing court don’t necessarily expect tenants to have lawyers, and they are likely to be reasonable if you do your homework as Arthur did, and know your rights.
     Artie weighs in "... Krauss and Elder's attorneys came on with bullying tactics and it was under this pressure at least a half dozen residents i'm aware of left the hotel. there are probably more. But from the start their case consisted of a bluff; they got called on it and crumbled, actually admitting to [Judge Wendt] they had no proof to support the claim that has had us in courtrooms, researching and writing legal motions since last november. Moreover opposing counsel conceded they'd be unlikely to find that proof in the future. Some would call this type of lawsuit 'frivilous'. If there is a 'round two', the only consolation might be that we'd get to use the rest of the research in support of our counterclaims."

BD No Longer Opposes Termination

I went to the arbitration hearing today and it was cancelled.  According to BD's attorney, BD has withdrawn its petition which was seeking to block their termination.  So BD is no longer in the house!

No BD at the Chelsea Hotel?

No one from BD has shown up yet at the Hotel as of 9:30 a.m.  Reportedly the locks on the manager's offices have been changed.  Maybe Marlene Krauss can send in some armed guards to keep them out like she did the Bards.  We're afraid they might cart off pieces of the famed staircase. 

Arbitration Between BD and Chelsea 23rd St. Corp.

Legends has managed to obtain a copy of the arbitration filing that will ultimately determine who will manage the Chelsea Hotel.  What happened in this case is that BD filed suit against the hotel (essentially Marlene Krauss, since she is the one running the show), alleging that Marlene fired them without cause, and that she has failed to pay them the Incentive Fee that she owes them.
           In a March 14, 2008 letter, Marlene (through a lawyer) charged BD with “Default and Willful Misconduct.”  The “default” charge means they didn’t perform certain of their duties (for instance, perhaps, as we speculated in last Thursday’s post, they didn’t renovate rooms as they were supposed to); as for the “willful misconduct,” that, too may involve some of the problems we discussed on Thursday.  We will have to wait until we can get copies of the supporting documents in the case to know for sure what Marlene alleged.
            Anyway, Marlene used these charges to justify firing BD, and also for withholding BDs Incentive Fee, which BD claims (and they say Marlene agrees) is a whopping $2,717,285!  Marlene gave BD a month to leave the hotel, which means they should have been out by April 14, but they will apparently continue to manage the hotel (at least this is what they say) until the arbitration case is decided.

            The case is scheduled to be heard on Monday May 5, although, of course, a decision probably won’t be reached for awhile. 

            (The document also reveals BD’s astonishing claim to have increased net operating income of the hotel by 225%, revenue per available room by more than 35%, occupancy from 73% to 88%, and room nights sold by 41%.) -- Ed Hamilton

Big News from Housing Court

Artie Nash has won his case against BD's lawyers!  Guess those banners won't be going anywhere after all. We'll post an interview with Artie a little later.

Imaginary Hipsters Shell Out Big Imaginary Bucks to Party at BDs Revamped Chelsea Hotel

     So guess what, a real reporter -- as opposed to electronic kind -- has had the sense to go down to the courthouse and look at the papers.   Chris Shott of The Observer reports that Marlene has fired BD for "willful misconduct" (wich no doubt includes some of what we discussed yesterday.).  BD, in turn is suing the Hotel for $2.7 million in "incentives" it says it is owed for increasing the hotel's profits 225%!  Wow -- and they said Stanley was cooking the books!  I wonder where all that new revenue could have come from.  Certainly it couldn't have been from renting rooms, since they slashed the rates.  Must be from that new spa in the basement and that rockin' club on the roof -- you know the one with the new express elevator jetting the hipsters skyward.  -- Ed Hamilton

From Catastrophe to Crisis: BD Out, Fife In

We have received reliable information to the effect that, as of May 5, BD Hotels will no longer be managing the Chelsea Hotel.  They have reportedly been fired by minority shareholder Marlene Krauss, Harvard MBA, who, together with lobby layabout David Elder, controls the Chelsea’s Board of Directors.  (Alternately, it’s possible that the courts may stall the transition: though Marlene has already sent BD a termination notice, they are contesting it.) (Photo of the hoteliers during happier days.  As usual, David Bernstein is missing.)

Sub-Prime Crisis Derails BD’s Plans

To the best of our knowledge, here’s what happened: BD, with the connivance of the minority shareholders, had planned all along to buy the Chelsea Hotel.  To accomplish this they needed a smoking gun to pressure the Bard Family into selling the building.  But apparently Stanley ran a pretty tight ship: teams of accountants working 24-hours-a-day could find no such smoking gun.  So the Bards have no reason to sell.  And now, due to the sub-prime crisis, BD Hotels—which we hear had a chunk of its assets financed by Bear Stearns — has no money to buy the building anyway.  So the “two guys with cell phones,” Richard Born and Ira Drukier (who own BD), have been forced to retrench in order to focus on their leveraged properties, and now will have their hands full simply managing the buildings they own.  They can’t afford to buy any new buildings at this point.

Marlene’s Beef

Over the course of BD’s tenure, plumber’s daughter turned corporate raider Marlene Krauss has reputedly had several general complaints:

1. No one from BD does any work (this is directed specifically at Director of Operations Glennon Travis, who sits in his office all day and rarely takes an active role in hotel operations, or in addressing guest’s and resident’s concerns)

2. The supposed general manager, David Bernstein, is rarely on the premises

3. BD is not fixing up the hotel.  In particular, BD is not renovating rooms, as promised, but merely warehousing them

4. The hotel is reportedly losing money (or at least not making as much as it did under Stanley Bard), due to the slashing of room rates, and also, in part, to residents withholding rent

Besides these general complaints, in the past week Marlene has had to come to the hotel repeatedly to micromanage the repair of a resident’s apartment. That, together with a few other things that we’ll discuss in a future article, appears to represent the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Fife to Head Chelsea

If our sources are as reliable as we believe them to be, good riddance to bad rubbish.  The ass-clowns of BD have truly been the Marx Brothers of hotel management, and we’ve all had a good laugh, but now it’s time to move on.  Which brings us to the next question: who will Marlene hire to manage the hotel now?  She promised the rest of the shareholders that they would make more money with Stanley out of the picture, but instead they are losing money.  She’d better make the right choice this time.

            We can’t read Marlene’s mind, but the rumor—nearly unbelievable, and we hope it’s not true—is that she intends to appoint David Elder as manager of the hotel!  So here’s the story: we are going from this (supposedly) elite hotel firm that was going to transform the Chelsea into an exclusive boutique hotel, to a complete nincompoop and moral midget with absolutely no experience doing anything, much less managing a large Manhattan hotel.  (Elder’s “job” at the Chelsea seems to consist of hanging out in the lobby, occasionally attempting to coax members of our community into spying for him.  For the past few years he has been engaged in a court battle with his stepfather, noted Author Piri Thomas, attempting to deny the elderly man his dividends from the Chelsea Hotel.)  If BD wasn’t qualified, then how is this lunkhead—who apparently is being manipulated by Marlene and various lawyers-- going to do the job?

Obviously, Marlene thinks she can continue to control Elder, but we’re not so sure; we think she may be creating a monster.  If Elder is manager, will he be the one reporting the profits?  Taking into consideration what he’s doing to Piri Thomas, what makes Marlene so sure she can expect to collect her dividends?

Haven’t the residents of this hotel been through enough?  Please, don’t torture us like this, Marlene.  This is going to be like the episode of The Andy Griffith Show where Barney Fife gets to be Sheriff for the day.  Only, I fear, without the laughs. "Nip it in the bud!" -- Ed Hamilton